Malignant is stupidly insane and I love it

Weird things start happening when a woman is suddenly accosted by a supernatural entity in her home and soon, she finds herself on a deep dive into her own past and the horrible secrets held there.

Also, there’s a creepy bendy man unaliving people left and right.

I’ll be perfectly honest… Malignant is stupid. Enchantingly, psychotically, magnificently stupid. I could go into more detail about why it is so splendidly, strikingly, impressively stupid, but that would give away crucial plot details and I just don’t want to do that. I don’t even want to throw up a spoiler warning and then talk about spoilers because I know there’s some idiot out there who will read them without seeing the movie and I don’t want to ruin the resplendent, awe-inspiring, coruscating stupidity that Malignant tosses in your face like a handful of glitter.

You may think that I find this movie lacking… that I could not and would not recommend it to anyone but, nay nay, my good friends. Although Malignant is dazzlingly, enlighteningly, and brazenly stupid, it is stupid in the most brilliant of ways, it is so stupid that it recognizes and embraces its stupidity like an old friend and then makes magical love to it, producing the most unholy of amalgamations which it spits at the screen and dares you not to enjoy.

Malignant… is probably the most fun I’ve had watching a movie in a long time. This movie may be stupid, but it’s never bad and you never really know where it’s going next. There are times when you think, “Oh, no… the movie won’t do that!” But then it winks at you, downs a bottle of Jack Daniels, strips naked, screams a war cry and does it anyway. The result is pure melodious fun.

I wouldn’t call this movie terrifying, but it has some impressive and disturbing visuals which are only enhanced by the reveal of what the actual hell is going on at the end of the movie. There is also an amazing shot that I had to audibly comment on as an overhead camera tracks the protagonist through a house and up the stairs to the second story in a single take. It was such an impressive, technically amazing shot and I can only assume that they actually built the entire set that way for that one shot and I love this movie for that.

Malignant is like one of those old Troma movies. It half way wants to traumatize you and it half way wants to mess with you and, in both instances, it succeeds beautifully. Without a doubt, Malignant is going to be a divisive movie and there will be no small number of peoples who will haaaaaaaate it and, to be honest, I completely get it and will nod in agreement with their reasoning.

Personally, though, I loved this stupid movie that loves its stupid and wants you to love it too.

And I did.

I totally did.

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