I am an old fart and I still remember the nerds rumbling after The Empire Strikes Back about how it ruined the first movie. For years, I remember hearing them complain about how Return of the Jedi was a terrible final chapter. For years, I listened to how much people hated the prequels, Rogue One, and Solo… fans don’t have a problem with challenging storylines, they have a problem with the new. They always have had that problem.
We see now that the prequels are suddenly beloved, everyone who complained about Solo being unneeded are suddenly acting like it’s the fun popcorn adventure that they’ve always wanted, and mark my words… in ten years, the sequel trilogy will be just as loved. All of these same bitter, angry, gatekeeping nerds who complain endlessly about The Last Jedi will change their tune all at once when their anger ebbs and admit that the sequel trilogy is as good as it deserves to be remembered.
Don’t feel down, Star Wars fans. It’s not just you. Star Trek fans love to talk about how terrible Discovery is while pining for the days of Voyager, Enterprise, and Deep Space Nine but, while those shows were on, those fans, in some cases the very same people, hated them with a passion.
They’re gatekeepers. They’re the ones who decide what the fans like and who gets to be a real fan.
Basically, they’re joyless, pathetic, and boring people and I despise them all. No one tells me what kind of fan I am and no one will tell me what I should enjoy and what I shouldn’t and I’m not about to pretend that quality work isn’t quality.
Does Rise of the Skywalker have problems? You bet it does. The movie is overstuffed, rather complicated in its execution, and somewhat of a mess given that it seems to be apologizing for a movie it has no business apologizing for and trying to please the fans who have demonstrated that that won’t be pleased and cannot be pleased.
It shouldn’t have done this, it should have gone forward and ignored them.
That being said, I enjoyed it, warts and all. It isn’t perfect, but not a lot is. What it delivers is a satisfying end to the sequel trilogy and a satisfying end to the Skywalker saga as a whole.
The movie is big, ridiculous, and silly and I love it for that. Does a lot of it make sense? Oh, goodness no… the return of the Emperor makes no sense whatsoever and his plan even less so, but honestly… how much sense did it make to build two Death Stars with obvious weak points? How much sense did it make to take over the Senate right in front of the Jedi who could have exposed you at your first mistake? Not a lot. Let’s stop pretending that the Emperor had the best plans.
Folks, I write this review as someone who loves Star Wars and as someone who grows more and more frustrated by an entitled fandom each and every day. Talking endlessly about things you pretend to hate does not make you an interesting person. It’s boring. It makes you boring. Talk about things that you love, and shut up about things that you don’t.
You may believe that no one will remember your incessant whining in ten years when you’re hating something new and singing the praises of these movies, but we will… and you will sound every bit as stupid as you think you will.
Jason Gaston 